People are so angry whether you are on the receiving end of gun violence, conducting the gun violence or are a bystander to the gun violence. We have been going through a lot for quite a while now, and especially in the last two and a half years and sadly it has changed the way we literally live.
Mentally and emotionally, many have been dealing with so much! Anxiety and depression can be residing in you or someone you know, and before we know it, it will be masked with anger. Experiencing mental illness is almost quite normal for us. Numbers are at an all time high.
You are not alone.
With that, self care has truly been dramatized and people have either jumped on the self care bandwagon and are finding that self care does not have to cost, OR people are refusing to “do self care” because everyone is doing it. So, here I am asking YOU, How are you taking care of yourself? How can you take better care of yourself? Is what you are doing now, hurting or helping you? Take a look at some of the habits you engage in daily, are they healthy habits or hurtful habits?
How you show up for yourself matters.
It is time for us all to press PAUSE and really, truly, look within. Do your part for you! You matter. Your mental health matters. How you respond and react to the world around you matters. How you show up for yourself matters. How you show up for your significant other matters. How you show up for your kids matters. How you show up for your friends matters. How you show up for your co-workers matters. How you show up for a stranger… matters. What will you do THIS week, to take care of you? Check out my previous blog on self care tips for some ideas. Be well.
Now that we have the 7 steps to discovering your true self, let’s dig deeper because I filled you up with so many valuable nuggets. For the next several posts we will dig deeper into each nugget.
Nugget #1: Write down what you like.
Self discovery has a lot to do with what we feel we may have lost within ourselves. A lot of times we see this in relationships or marriages. Understand who you are. What do you like? What don’t you like? What we like tends to bring us some sort of joy for a moment. What do you like to do? What did you like to do that you used to do that you don’t do anymore? That was a mouthful, read that again. As you read this, I would like you to write down at least five things that you would like to do that brings you some joy. This could even include a goal or two you may have for yourself.
Many of us put the things we like and even our goals aside to adjust to the “new life” we find ourselves in. Sometimes we do this without realizing it until years go by and sometimes we do this because we THING we cannot commit or find time for ourselves. Now, there may be some things you may have to adjust to especially when you have kids or have to take care of a family member. AND I want you to remember you CAN get back to YOU.
What if I told you that you can still be in a relationship or have certain responsibilities and MAKE time for you to do whatever it is you want to do? (With reason and respect of course).
What if you set aside specific time for you and your list of likes or for you and your goals?
What if you set a timer so that you have control over the time spent and can be more intentional about what it is you are wanting to do?
What if you discovered your purpose in life and it happens to be something you like and enjoy doing?
What value are you fulfilling?
What if you had thirty minutes to do something you like today, what would you do?
I lost myself in a relationship and was stripped from my social life. I was being consistently inconsistent with myself in what I needed because I was trying to please others in an unhealthy way. I had to relearn some things about myself including WHO I was. So I had to ask myself and was asked in counseling: Who is Jasmine? What does Jasmine like?
It took me a while to know and understand it was okay to like to do what it was I liked to do. Who are you really? Be okay with who you are and what you like. Give yourself permission to change over time. Give yourself permission and time to identify what these things are even if you have forgotten or have been forgotten. Identify what you values are and how what you like align with those values. Understanding WHY these things are important to you will allow you to give yourself permission to set aside time for them.
I like being social and meeting new people.
I like doing community service work for a cause.
I like to explore new restaurants and go to happy hours.
I like to eat ice cream and sit outside and let the sun melt it as I try to hurry and eat it.
I like to blast music (all genres) throughout my house.
I like to talk and share laughs on the phone with my friends who no longer reside close to me.
I like to listen to my favorite podcasts.
I like to learn by reading or attending trainings from all over the world.
I like to workout outside when the weather is over 65 degrees.
I like to watch horror movies on Saturday afternoons.
Everything you need for your success, you have it inside you. Don’t let anyone talk you out of your dreams or goals. Those are YOURS. Go after it! So I ask you again, what do you like? What are you going to do in order to allow yourself to tap into those things today?
To see the full blog I wrote on self discovery, click here.